Sleep disorders

I don't know what the deal is! Josiah is having major sleep issues.

He started sleeping through the night by the time he was 3 months old. He was doing great, rarely waking in the night, sleeping until 8 or 9. When he turned 6 months old suddenly he was waking twice a night. This was hell for me. I was so used to my sleeping all night long and my body did not adjust to the sudden change in schedule that well. Well after reading several books and trying several approaches we finally got him sleeping through the night again, but he was now waking up promptly at 7am. That lasted for about 3 weeks. Now he's doing it again.

Last night he woke up at 1am just frantic. I tried and tried to get him to sleep without nursing him as I don't want him waking up out of habit just to get a drink of mommy milk. But after about 45min to an hour of screaming I finally gave in. It still took him another 30 min. or so to fall asleep. He then slept until 6am when he woke up again. Once again he was crying frantically. I laid with him in his room which didn't work, I nursed him, which didn't work. I tried to let him roll around and expend some energy which didn't work.

I finally told him that I was tired and he needed to go to sleep because it wasn't morning yet. So I put him in his crib, turned on some lullaby music and laid down on the bed in his room. He talked, he rolled, he stood, he played with his toys and I fell asleep. Apparently he too fell asleep because the next thing I remember is hearing him sit up and start fussing at 8:30.

I was still exhausted, and very crabby. But we got up out of bed and went through our regular routine. Diaper, story, breakfast, play, new clothes, and at 10:30 it was time for a nap. Josiah was crabby so I knew he was tired and ready to lay down, and so was I. We went upstairs and started our naptime routine. A little milk and a snuggle with mommy. He started to fall asleep instantly which is great! However, when I went to lay him down he started to fuss. I picked him up and began to dance with him so that he would fall back asleep, which he did. I went to lay him down again and again be started to fuss. I picked him up again, but now it was too late. His eyes were wide open and he was MAD. We walked, we sang, we rocked, we tried milk again. But he was awake now. So... I told him he needed to go to sleep. I put him in his crib and went downstairs.

He was fine. I heard him playing, I heard him standing, I heard him talking quietly to himself. But he wasn't fussing, and he wasn't crying. He was getting quieter and talking slower and I thought to myself, "yes! he's going to put himself to sleep!" I did some laundry, I did some dishes, I got dressed and ready for the day. And he got quieter and quieter. Then, all of a sudden, he started crying. So I went up there to check on him.

He was laying down, rolling around and sucking on his blankie, which is what he does just before he falls asleep. But he was crying and crying. I picked him up and he got more angry. I went out of the room to look out the window and he calmed a little. Then I smelled it. He had messed his diaper. No wonder he couldn't fall asleep. So I changed him which woke him up even more. He started playing around and lauging trying to tease me. So I nursed him again. This time he only drank briefly and then pulled away. So I danced with him and sang until his eyes were closed. I tried to lay him down, and again, he fussed. I wasn't going to go through with this again. I danced with him and then rocked him in the chair until he was completely out cold. Then laid him down and left. The time was 12:00.

It took me an hour and a half to get him to go down for a nap. I can't do this! He is nine months old! At what age is he going to be able to lay down and go to sleep by himself? He has done it before. Back in the day when he was 4 and 5 months old he would do it. But now he can sit up and he can stand up and to get him to lay down in his crib to go to sleep is practically impossible. I know it's totally my fault that he does this. Since he was so coliky as a baby we had no choice but to nurse, dance and rock him to sleep. The problem is that now he likes it, he's used to it, and he doesn't want it any other way.

I know there are ways to get him to sleep on his own. But I refuse to let him just cry it out and me and my husband don't have the patience to do many of the other things. However, we need to nip this thing in the bud. I think I could do it. I think I could tolerate the crying and the anger and the countless times of picking him up and laying down, if I had the support of my husband. But my husband is so crabby when he's tired. He's worse than little Josiah. If Luke is woken up in the night he can hardly function. He has no tolerance for crying and no patience to put the baby to sleep. I don't know what I'm going to do. I suppose I could start at naptimes like I tried to do today. But what happens if he crys and fights all through his naptime. Do we just push naps back an hour (like I did today) or do we skip the nap alltogether? I think I'm in for a few more weeks of parenting hell.